Verbatim from a December 2014 entry in The Journal of Quirky Girl, the following incident of pre-holiday mayhem earned a special place in the Funnier in Retrospect category.
This morning was like something out of a deranged comedy.
It started off with my son declaring it “A Horrible Day” after accidentally spilling his cup of apple juice all over himself and pretty much everything else in the kitchen during breakfast.
And then it got better.
When we piled into the car to go to school, my child was still alternately sulking/ranting over what a bad day it was.
Distracted, I backed out of the garage too quickly.
The passenger mirror smashed into a million pieces after colliding with the side of the garage, knocking the garage door off its track.
The shattered mirror dangled lifelessly by a wire.
Thoroughly distraught, we hopped into the truck. The car would have to be dealt with later.
As we backed out of the driveway, the truck’s massive tires took out the candy cane Xmas lights I had spent hours putting up the day before. Flattened and crushed like roadkill.
Ho ho ho, into the trash they go.
“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” was playing on the radio.
And so the day had begun…
The title pretty much sums it up.
~Comically Quirky is finally on Twitter! Follow me: @comicallyquirky . Thanks!!!~
comically quirky 
Ahhh I’ve knocked over sooo many side mirrors back when I was driving!! Now I don’t drive anymore because of such incidents!
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Haha! I’ve actually considered becoming strictly a pedestrian, for everyone’s safety. But it’s awfully difficult to stick with it. It’s either to hot, too cold, too far away… So back behind the wheel I go. Look out, world! 😀
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Ho ho ho, into the trash they go
That made me laugh so much.
I picked the kids up from school and said, “Look how pretty it is after the rain! Don’t you just love the fresh air after it rained at night?” Both kids yelled NO at the same time, it was too cold and windy at school. (but it’s sunny out, minus the wind, it’s nice) They grumbled-grumbled-grumbled.
Then we follow a tree-trimming truck into our condo complex and he blocks my cul-de-sac driveway entrance. So I honk and get the other tree-trimming guy’s attention, that had half the small street blocked with his tree-trimming truck and wood chipper. (why our small complex required two of these vehicles, I don’t know!) I point to my driveway…OMG the antics it took for the other dude (who now get himself stuck / blocked in next to the brick wall and my driveway) to back out and not hit any other neighbors car in their mini-driveways, and the wood-chipper truck. Ugh. It took us 15 minutes to park.
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Ugh! That sounds like my daily dilemma of living in a new development, where there are always construction vehicles barricading me at the most inopportune times.
Already late picking the kids up from school? Ha! Well, guess what? You’re not getting past that concrete mixer/bulldozer/semi truck that’s parked horizontally across, blocking the entire freaking street.
Time to turn around and try to find another way out. Again.
Ho ho NO!!!
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We live in an ideal spot of our condo complex. A main street in the neighborhood divides our complex. The majority of condos are on the other side. We have a narrow street with about 30 condos. We are the very last condo, next to a brick wall before houses. It’s a tiny-tiny cul-de-sac. To park a vehicle on our “street” it’s nearly impossible or tight squeeze to inch past. We had two big trucks trying to squeeze into that corner- blocking my driveway. 🙂 There was lots of reversing going on, 3pt. turns (well, 5) Thanks everyone – btw- we are leaving in 30 minutes for an orthodontic appt. Keep that in mind, please. Don’t park here after we go inside.
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Amazing how a simple u-turn can become a futile, complex, and stress-inducing 28-point turn. 😛
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Everything happens in three’s in my world when stuff goes south and this sounds like the theory of three hit your world. Apple juice, mirror, roadkill. Yup. This post also reminded me of the time the garage door wasn’t quite up high enough -it had slid down a hair – and sliced off the antenna centered on the hood of the beloved Honda Fit. I proceeded to have a Fit. Fortunately the slice was so “clinical” in nature I actually was able to procure a replacement antenna and the repair did not require any rewiring…which kept me from getting more wired. A comically quirky day for you indeed!
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That is the exact same view I’ve always had- that misfortunes tend to occur in threes. Or multiples of three. Or in exponential increments of three. Which would probably explain how I’m in the triple digits already, come to think of it…
Thank goodness having a sense of humor goes a long way. 😀
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