Turkeys totally love me!
As a vegetarian, I pose absolutely zero threat to those poor fellows.
But enough about that.
Let’s kick the day off with a little humor, shall we?
(Even if he can’t pass for a ghost, he may at least be able to pass as an albino turkey. And who the heck wants to eat that?)
(Um, hello!?! Surely the alarms in your turkey-brained head must be blaring by now!)
(Sorry to break it to you, but sometimes the truth hurts.)
(When you put it that way, it does sound more like a day at the spa, rather than the one-way ticket to inferno that it really is. But hey, enjoy that rubdown!)
(Save your breath, little turkey. You couldn’t pay me enough to make me want to eat you. Consider it my early Christmas present to you.)
(Bet that grass is looking like a pretty appealing option right about now.)
(Sure, but don’t get too complacent. Traditions can change over time, you know.)
(Presumably, eating and being stuffed from the other end are not exactly one and the same.)
(I swear, the need for posting every single thing on social media can get a little out of hand sometimes. Find a better hobby, turkey! On second thought, don’t worry about that right now…)
(Excellent point. Much like Columbus Day, Thanksgiving is yet another holiday of questionable origins.)
What exactly is it that we are celebrating, again?
Truly, Thanksgiving is a time to enjoy spending with family and friends, celebrating the multitude of reasons to be thankful, today and every day.
Because there are always reasons to be grateful in this life.
~Happy Thanksgiving, my friends! Hope you all have a wonderful day, whether you choose to celebrate with tofu or turkey. Or a Tofurky. I promise I won’t judge! ~