Rawr!
Fear me!
I’m a Stegosaurus!
Um, yeah.
Okay.
My cute, cuddly Stegosaurus Boy stands in the backyard, wielding a neon orange baseball bat.
Keeping himself occupied, he pitches himself a Nerf football while waiting for me to hunt down an actual baseball.
I like squirrels and Stegosauruses!
I wonder if he’s forgotten that he also likes cheese with his squirrels?
Eat my cheese! It’s spoiled!
First of all, eww.
And secondly… what?!?
I’m a Stegosaurus!
Fear me, foul creature!
I pitch him a ball.
He lightly grazes it with a foul.
Come on, you sweaty savage!
He’s clearly talking about himself.
It may be 90+ degrees out, but I don’t sweat.
I sparkle.
Cheeseburger! Cheeseburglar!
Did I miss something?
Is Cheeseburglar McDonald’s new counterpart to Hamburglar?
I want to be hit by the ball. I want to be harmed!
Sorry, but going to the hospital isn’t on today’s agenda. So pay attention and use the freaking bat!
Yay! That’s harassment!
We switch up, and crazy Stegosaurus Boy refuses to wear his baseball glove.
Swing, batter batter, swing!
He pitches to me.
Crack!
The ball soars over the neighbor’s fence.
I didn’t know girls could hit like that!
Oh, but I’m not just any girl.
I’m apparently the mother of a crazed Stegosaurus.
I’m freakishly powerful.
His next pitch is hurled in the general direction of a plastic bucket.
The bucket misses.
Bucket, you suck!
Sniff my butt!
By this point, I can’t be sure whether he’s trash-talking the bucket, the innocent ladybug sitting atop the bucket, or me.
Rawr, rawr, rawr!
I think that’s our cue to go back inside.
So Stegosaurus Boy goes inside to continue a riveting game of The Sims.
Come on, you freaking deranged lunatic! Get up and go find a job!
Unemployed and stressed out, one of his poor Sims putters around a humble little house with a dozen wild cats.
The possessed cats were peeing everywhere in this house lined with toilets, treadmills, and foosball tables.
Puddles of cat pee spread across an alarming portion of the floor.
I gave you toilets! Toilets! Use the toilets!
Meanwhile, my other son keeps himself occupied in a similar fashion.
Playing Disney Infinity, he’s clearly the master of chaos.
At the bottom of an ocean lies Fear from Inside Out, a horse, spinning teacups, monster trucks, flying beds, bulldozers, an elephant, a Muppet bus…
And a wrecking ball.
Such torturous carnage.
So much for being a G-rated game…
What is it with boys?
They both wake up and start shooting and destroying everything in sight on games like Deer Hunter and Roblox the moment they awake.
Which, ironically, seems to be earlier than they ever got up for school.
Is this what summer vacation is all about?
And I’m pretty sure the only reason they haven’t been eating cookies for breakfast is solely due to the fact that we’ve run out.
Because they’ve eaten them all already.
Ah, the glorious start of summer.
~Happy Friday, friends! Have a fantastic weekend!~
This was a cute story. ‘Sniff my butt’ is gonna be the new trending insult.
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Oh, I can only hope that phrase doesn’t catch on any time soon. 😝
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😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️
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😄
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Hmmmm, this sounds like me in my wonderful early retirement!!!! Just add boats and power tools…
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Haha! As great as that sounds, I think we’re going to have to stick to a power tool-free zone for the time being. 😝
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Oh, right…. BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Exactly 😄
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Hehehe
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Not a dull moment in sight for you, not till the summer vacations are over at least. We are yet to begin. I hope your sanity keeps a firm hold until the very end of the vacations, at least I am hoping (against hope) that I can keep mine 🙂
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So far, so good. We’ve been enjoying our mostly lazy, sometimes crazy summer break without excessive chaos. 😝
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Enjoy, QG
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Enjoy your summer hols and have fun… 😉
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Thank you! Hope you’re having a wonderful week! 😊
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In the movie, THE GRADUATE, Benjamin (Dustin Hoffman) is given 1 word to help shape his future by an attendee at his party. The word was “PLASTICS.”
To enjoy a lovely summer vacation with young boys, I too have 1 word of advice …Duct Tape! (I live in the south so this is considered 1 word 🙂 ) It provides security for the entire family knowing exactly where your children are. This is important since a small piece covering their lips makes it quite challenging to hear them. 😀
Wishing you and the entire gang a joyful and fun summer time!
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Hmmm. After much consideration, I’ve decided that duct tape will officially be off-limits in this household. I wouldn’t want to end up getting duct taped upside down to the wall by a team of mischievous mavericks. 😛
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You’re a smart lady…my mother learned the hard way! 😀
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I have it on very good authority (with photographic evidence) that squirrels do like cheese. Please keep them a safe distance away from the stegosaurus, though….
I was sad to learn when I did my McDonaldland post a long, long time ago that Mickey Dee’s officially did away with all of the familiar characters except Ronald about 15 years ago, which is why they’re never in commercials anymore. So the Hamburglar (And Cheeseburglar, if there is such a beast) are out in the unemployment line with Grimace and the Fry Guys…
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No doubt, squirrels do like cheese. My child told me so, which instantly makes it an indisputable fact. 😛
Not only do I not go to McDonald’s, I also must not watch nearly enough TV, as I had no clue Hamburglar and his pals all fell into the black hole of oblivion. And so long ago, at that. Wow! :0
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‘Sparkle’ on!
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Sparkling is waaaay more graceful than sweating. I’d take a little sparkle any day. 😜
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Great post!
I love hearing stories about kids, as I didn’t go that route. That’s where it ends tho, at stories 😉
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Kids make for terrific cheap entertainment. I’d be far less inspired, creative, and entertaining without their influence. 😜
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I think adults should get summer vacation too. The whole country should shut down in the summer. I still want some good stegosaurus days!
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I agree! Everybody deserves a break. Stegosauruses, unite! 😝
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That’s some good trash talkin’! Thanks for the chuckles.x
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That Stegosaurus…I mean boy… is such a pro. 😝
Glad you enjoyed!
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ah school holidays, nice take … I’d forgotten I had them … good luck 🙂
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In a lot of ways, it’s a break for me as well. No mad rush to school in the morning, no teacher phone calls… yeah, it’s definitely a break. 😝
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This is too funny Angelica! At least you won’t have a dull moment with boys, just think how different it would be if you had girls instead. Cherish these moments because soon they’ll be young “men” in no time. Oh and I loved that part where you say ” I don’t sweat, I sparkle.” That truly is an interesting take.
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No, definitely never a dull moment around here! My boys are fun and crazy and all that good stuff. I don’t think I could handle girls… 😝
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You mother-types have the patience of Job. I’m just a fairy dog-mother whose charges sniff sewer grates, hold water in their jowls and dribble it all over the floor, bark coded profanities at the UPS man, and fart all night long. 🙂
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Bark coded profanities at the UPS man! Love it! 😝
Boys do tend to fart a lot, though, just like animals….
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OMG! You crack me up! I can relate to the nightly farting and can add rolling in fragrant feces…. 😛
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I suppose kids and dogs have that in common as well. Diapers are equally as uh, aromatic. Nothing beats waking up to that delightful stench. 😝
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Your post has left me smiling, it’s looks like a lovely, long summer awaits us…
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Indeed, it will be a long, lovely summer. 😝
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