Jail (For a) Break

/ Quirky Girl

Do people ever break in to jail?

No?

Well, I suppose there’s a first time for everything.

Most days, I drive by the local police station.

Some days, I’m tempted to turn myself in.

For a crime I haven’t even committed.

After being imprisoned in a vehicle with two brawling beasts for a matter of mere minutes…

Let’s just say a much-needed break is in order.

A vacation, if you will.

With free room and board.

And courtyards.

And even a complimentary library.

What’s not to like?

Sure, prison food might leave a bit to be desired.

But at least I wouldn’t have to do the cooking.

I’d say that probably qualifies as an acceptable trade-off.

And yes, amenities may be lacking.

But just think:

A break from never-ending heaps of laundry!

And from vacuuming and mopping!

And from stepping on Legos dangerously scattered across every inch of floor!

Oh, and what’s this I hear about free healthcare?

Just give me a couple of books, and a notebook and a pen, and I’ll be good to go.

But first, I need a plausible excuse.

You know…

People do get arrested for not wearing a seat belt.

And sometimes for using profanity in public places.

I even had a teacher in high school who managed to get thrown in jail for jaywalking.

Or what about twerking in public?

Surely, that could land a bit of time away from it all?

Some states have really bizarre laws that could earn some time in the slammer.

Did you know it’s illegal to drive blindfolded in Alabama?

(I don’t know why anyone would, but okay…)

And in Iowa, you simply can’t throw a brick onto a highway.

(Good luck pulling that one off.)

And in Missouri, bear wrestling is banned.

(Now we’re talking!)

And North Carolina heavily frowns upon Drunk Bingo.

(Woo hoo! Sounds like a good time!)

Oh, but there are no beaches in jail.

So maybe that’s not quite the right place for me.

Yeah.

Come to think of it, what I truly need is a relaxing trip to the beach…

~Happy Friday, friends! Hope you enjoy a bit of a break this weekend!~

Ah! Just what the doctor ordered...

Ah! Just what the doctor ordered…

54 thoughts on “Jail (For a) Break”

    • lol! I’ve always kind of thought about jail in this way… but then I think about the beauty of outdoors and say… “Okay, this is why I don’t want to go to jail…” Not to mention jail fights, claustrophobia, lack of tacos, or even death! LOL

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      • Haha! True enough. Although I think most jail cells have itty bitty windows, so you could still enjoy the beauty of the outdoors. From indoors. Without heaps of laundry or worrying about what to make for dinner. 😛

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      • You sound like me, ANYTHING to not do laundry lol! I currently have had laundry offsite for the past three years since I’ve moved into an apartment and I’ve considered just not wearing clothes anymore or just throwing them away and buying new ones. (j/k….kind of)

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      • Haha! Definitely not a fan of endless cycles of laundry. I still have a pile of laundry sitting on my bed… and I momentarily contemplated stuffing it under the bed, just so it would go away. 😜

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  3. You are so funny. Yes, the beach may be better suited for a break 🙂 Those laws are fascinating! Bear wrestling?! I hope your weekend was joyful. I had a super booked one, as I’m reading for a doctoral program in spiritual science so was wrapping up a treatise. Was actually pretty cool.
    Have a good week! Blessings, Debbie
    ps – that photo of you and your dog is priceless. 🙂

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  6. I’d love to be the caller for Drunk BINGO. L-86! I repeat, L-86. The brick throwing reminded me of a news story–a man threw a brick through the window of a McDonalds, with a note rubber-banded to it that said “You deserve a brick today.” Off to jail, buddy. 🙂

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  7. As a former weekly bingo player myself (Yes, really!), I can’t imagine how much rowdier a crowd of old ladies could possibly get if they were even slightly inebriated, let alone completely drunk. I know I wouldn’t want to be the caller for drunk bingo!

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  11. Great meme!! Getting away from it all sounds like a wonderful option in life.
    I have NO IDEA WHY, but this post made me think of a movie I saw in 1972. It was called, “The Hot Rock” starring Robert Redford, George Segal, Ron Liebman, Paul Sand, Zero Mostel, etc… If you feel like sitting back and “getting away from it all” for about 2 hours while laughing incessantly, go get this movie from your local library (or netflicks.) You won’t be disappointed! 😀

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  15. yes I immediately thought you were a drunk bingo or bear wrestling type! Must admit the free library has tempted me several times and we do time for not paying the fine … trouble is I don’t get fined … 😦

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