Much Ado About Lemons

Pop quiz!!!

Oh, relax.

There’s only one question, and no wrong answers.

It’ll be fun!

Here we go…

WHEN LIFE HANDS YOU LEMONS, YOU ARE MOST LIKELY TO:

a) Pull on your sweatpants, grab a few pints of Chunky Monkey, and indulge in a three day marathon of tear-jerkers, including John Q and The Pursuit of Happyness, then bawl for days over the myriad of injustices in life.

b) Find your inner peace after thoroughly exhausting yourself by going postal on random objects- the neighbor’s hideous Halloween scarecrow they have yet to take down, the coffee maker that just kicked the bucket, the freakishly large rat scurrying by…

c) Throw those lemons at someone deserving. A few helpful options:  that toxic frenemy you can’t seem to cut loose, a particularly infuriating coworker, or the out-of-control maniac in a semi who just cut you off on the freeway.

d) Use your pent-up aggression to squeeze every last drop of lemon juice out with your bare hands like a Viking masseuse and make a badass (and probably dangerously potent) lemon martini.

e) Other (please elaborate)

While these are all very logical (and highly acceptable) approaches, I’d personally go with option c.

After all, research clearly shows that actively doing something to alleviate troubles can be highly beneficial.

And how much more proactive can one get than hurling objects across the room?

So…which did you choose?

~Happy Friday, everyone! Hope you all have a lemon-free weekend… Unless, of course, you were planning on making a lemon martini!~

No Viking masseuses were available, so I made this one myself.

No Viking masseuses were available, so I had to make this one myself.

(Much Ado About Lemons originally appeared on Comically Quirky on 10/08/2015)

67 thoughts on “Much Ado About Lemons

  1. I’d rather make a few sour lemon meringue pies, invite some frenemies over, put on Gloria Esteban “The Conga” and whack each one with a pie in the face as they kick their way on by. Then, I’ll kick back and sip my maritini while I watch them slip, slide, and collide. 🍸 🍋 🍋 😇

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Someone once sent me a lemon (From California, no less!) Having no use for lemons, I did the only rational thing to do in that situation and put the lemon in my fridge. A few years later, it no longer looked like a lemon, so I had to actually throw it away. Maybe the best way to deal with philosophical lemons is to banish them to someplace cold and forget about them until they’ve sufficiently molded over…

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    • Hmm. Someone sent you a lemon? As in one single lemon? I wonder if that is better or worse than receiving a whole basket filled with lemons? Then that poor little lemon could’ve turned to mush in good company! 😂

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  3. I would take a few and toss them into a pan and make a quick Indian ‘pickle’ that will serve as a tasty accompaniment to many meals after and watch the happy family indulging in its bitter-sour spicy taste and forget about all that is missing in the rest of the imperfect dishes that are devoured without complain.

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  4. Similar to a. I would throw a pity party extraordinaire. Sleeping the day away and feeling sorry for myself does wonders … NOT … yet that’s my go-to solution when lemons make an appearance in my life.

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  5. Though I love fresh squeezed lemonade, and KoolKosher’s idea sounds sublime…in context of anger it might ruin it for me when I’m more me so not sure what I’d do! In context of your suggestions I might try making a lemon margarita!
    Naw, I know, I’d throw them against a brick wall and watch them split and splash all over the place.
    But in the end, geez what a waste of good lemons!
    Hope you have a great memorial weekend!

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  6. Other …I’d make some deliciously icy lemonade, the kind that gives you a brain freeze. I love lemons in any form, and don’t get upset about much of anything, so throwing them at someone/something would waste those luscious lemons. 🙂

    Liked by 4 people

  7. I would ignore the lemons as a whole and choose to deal with them one at a time. Some lemons will roll away if you don’t acknowledge them, others rot; it’s about picking them up at just the right time.
    Or.. there’s always a good cry in the shower. Lol

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