@thebiglybestestdoggie: Just waiting under the Christmas tree for Santa. It’s been a challenging year, but I’ve tried extra hard to be a very good boy and bring lots of joy to my family and friends. So Santa, please come soon!!!
~ Wishing all of our wonderful friends a very Merry Christmas and hopefully a much more sane and peaceful New Year. Much love to you all ❤ ~
@thebiglybestestdoggie: Just getting ready for the big day! Did you know I’m one of Santa’s helpers? It’s true! I’m his favoritest elf! I even have a shiny red squeaky ball, in case Santa needs help guiding his sleigh on Christmas Eve. Ooh, I’m so excited!
Santa, I have been a very, very good boy this year!
~Merry Christmas, friends! Wishing you all a wonderful holiday season, filled with joy and love.~
@thebiglybestestdoggie: Dear Santa, I’ve been a very good doggie this year. Can I please have extra treats this Christmas? And maybe another one of those squeaky Kong balls? Also, if you wouldn’t mind giving me a quick belly rub on your way back up the chimney, I’d be so happy. Thanks, Santa!
With a face like this, of course I’m on Santa’s Nice List!
~Happy Tuesday, friends! What’s on your Christmas Wish List this year?~
@thebiglybestestdoggie: OMG! Santa came! OMG! I made the Nice List! Even after I accidentally chewed up part of that gingerbread house on Christmas Eve! I AM a good doggie! OMG! OMG!!!
~Happy Tuesday, friends! Jett certainly enjoyed his first Christmas in the crazy Quirky household. Hope you all had a wonderful holiday, too!~
‘Twas the week before Christmas, and all through Santa’s workshop,
The reindeer were busy plotting mischief and mayhem.
It’s true, Santa gets most of the glory.
But what about those hard-working reindeer?
They shoulder the bulk of the burden, carrying the weight of Santa and his gazillion tons of toys all around the world in a single night.
That’s no small feat, and it’s little wonder those creatures love their reindeer games so much.
(The jolly ol’ dude’s weight has always been a delicate topic, but the reindeer aren’t known for their diplomacy.)
(Hauling Santa’s donut-shoveling corpse around is more strenuous than hauling 386 sacks of toys at once.)
(A GPS can only get you so far, especially when the reindeer have been tampering with it. While this mishap may not be the best example of a good time for all, it probably breaks up the monotony of a long night.)
(Who can blame these reindeer for wanting to make the most of this opportunity for mischief? Although frankly, I’m surprised Santa doesn’t get himself stuck every single time he crams himself down one of those things.)
(Reindeer work hard and deserve a break! Which evidently involves partying hard and accidentally impaling Santa’s elves…)
(Modern technology has done wonders in taking a huge load off Santa’s back.)
(I believe I can fly! I believe I can touch the… oops, the sky is the other direction! Well, so much for that…)
(While the burden of hauling a five billion-ton sleigh falls on the reindeer, Santa gets his workout by sucking it all in and repeatedly diving in and out of strangers’ chimneys in the middle of the night.)
(Your reindeer are begging you to put that donut down! In the spirit of the holidays, don’t be such a glutton!)
(In such a role reversal, do the reindeer now hop out of the sleigh to slide down chimneys and deliver the toys? Or does Santa still have to do that, in addition to his newly assigned duty of pulling the sleigh?)
(This is one of the sounds of the season, surely?)
(Hey, if the shoe fits… Ho, ho, hole! Merry Christmas!)
~Happy Saturday, friends! Have a fantastic weekend, and a very Merry Christmas!~
(Reindeer Games originally appeared on Comically Quirky on 12/16/16)
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Santa’s rogue elves sent to me:
Twelve crazy boys howling in cacophony.
Okay, fine.
I have only two boys, not twelve.
But sometimes, with all the sugar-fueled insanity of the season, it’s hard to believe this chaos isn’t caused by a busload of boys.
What makes matters even more humorous is the apparent lack of understanding of what exactly it means to be “good.”
Does calling your brother a freak instead of a jerk constitute acceptable behavior?
Or what about whacking said brother over the head with a soft-covered graphic novel…instead of a baseball bat?
Is that good(ish) behavior?
Sigh.
Well, if nothing else, we all know by now that everything in life is subject to relativity.
On that note…
Presenting a dozen thoughts that have gone through my head (or actually come out of my mouth) during holiday seasons over the years.
1) You really think you’ve been good enough to even receive coal!?! Ha!
2) Define “good.”
3) I told Santa you thought you’ve been good this year. He cracked a rib laughing.
4) One word for you: Krampus.
5) Santa is watching. Well yeah, I guess technically that means Krampus is watching, too…
6) Fine. Be naughty. Santa would be happy to save himself a trip!
7) The moment you stop believing is the moment you start receiving socks and underwear. Remember that!
8) No, I’m not sure why Santa likes cookies so much. Yes, he’s a “big dude.”
9) No, we will not create a special chimney for Santa. He can go through the door like every other respectable human being.
10) Sorry, no. Putting you in time out will not cement my place alongside you on the naughty list.
11) One more word and we’ll pack up your toys and donate them all to kids in need. Seriously, knock it off! Or we’ll donate you, too.
12) Yeah, I know you’re having visions of sugar plums. Visions of throwing them at my head, perhaps? (Come on. We all know nobody actually eats those things.)
~Ho, ho, ho! Happy Thursday and Merry Christmas to you all, my wonderful friends! May your holiday be full of joy and happiness.~
Santa knows a lie when he hears one, so don’t bother trying to fool him. Bribery, on the other hand, just might do the trick…
‘Twas the week before Christmas, and all through Santa’s workshop,
The reindeer were busy plotting mischief and mayhem.
It’s true, Santa gets most of the glory.
But what about those hard-working reindeer?
They shoulder the bulk of the burden, carrying the weight of Santa and his gazillion tons of toys all around the world in a single night.
That’s no small feat, and it’s little wonder those creatures love their reindeer games so much.
(The jolly ol’ dude’s weight has always been a delicate topic, but the reindeer aren’t known for their diplomacy.)
(Hauling Santa’s donut-shoveling corpse around is more strenuous than hauling 386 sacks of toys at once.)
(A GPS can only get you so far, especially when the reindeer have been tampering with it. While this mishap may not be the best example of a good time for all, it probably breaks up the monotony of a long night.)
(Who can blame these reindeer for wanting to make the most of this opportunity for mischief? Although frankly, I’m surprised Santa doesn’t get himself stuck every single time he crams himself down one of those things.)
(Reindeer work hard and deserve a break! Which evidently involves partying hard and accidentally impaling Santa’s elves…)
(Modern technology has done wonders in taking a huge load off Santa’s back.)
(I believe I can fly! I believe I can touch the… oops, the sky is the other direction! Well, so much for that…)
(While the burden of hauling a five billion-ton sleigh falls on the reindeer, Santa gets his workout by sucking it all in and repeatedly diving in and out of strangers’ chimneys in the middle of the night.)
(Your reindeer are begging you to put that donut down! In the spirit of the holidays, don’t be such a glutton!)
(In such a role reversal, do the reindeer now hop out of the sleigh to slide down chimneys and deliver the toys? Or does Santa still have to do that, in addition to his newly assigned duty of pulling the sleigh?)
(This is one of the sounds of the season, surely?)
(Hey, if the shoe fits… Ho, ho, hole! Merry Christmas!)
~Happy Friday, friends! If you’re looking for an inspirational (and humorous!) new blog to follow, please check out Playing by My Own Rules. Have an awesome weekend!~
Ho ho ho!
It’s time to start thinking about which list you’ve managed to land yourself on this year!
What’s that?
You’ve been a perfect angel?
Ha!
Who are you kidding?
Surely, you do know Santa sees you when you’re sleeping.
And he knows when you’re awake.
Oh, and he also watches your every move…
365 days a year.
Okay, so he’s basically a generous gift-giving stalker, when you think about it.
Anyway, let’s see what kind of sorry excuses we can come up with for our less than saintly behavior this year, shall we?
(Everything in life is relative, and therefore subject to opinion. So, who knows? Santa may well have flexible guidelines. Or low standards.)
(Again, another matter of relativity. But seriously, what criteria must one meet to even qualify for Santa’s nice list?)
(Just as well. If you’re holding out hope for a fantastic gift, you’d be better off buying it yourself in the first place, anyway.)
(I can confidently say I’ve been both naughty-ish and nice-ish this year. With that said, does this mean I’ve been good enough to deserve a present or two, or should I be expecting a stocking full of coal?)
(Nah, it’s never too late! Unless it’s already Christmas morning, in which case, yeah, you’re probably out of luck…)
( If you’re getting coal this Christmas, why not at least have the satisfaction of knowing you’ve truly earned it for a job well done?)
(Naughtily nice. Now there’s an oxymoronic concept. Well, I suppose if you’re going to do something, might as well put a little extra effort in and do it well.)
(Oh, little minion. With all the antics and mayhem you’ve caused, you probably haven’t even been good enough to receive coal this year!)
(Excellent point. No need to over-explain things to the point where you land yourself right back on that naughty list.)
(Now we’re talking! This is totally true! Okay, probably true. Maybe true? Augh!)
(Look, if he wants to drop by in the wee hours of the night, the least he could do is clean up after himself. Is that really so unreasonable?)
(Take that, Santa! Serves you right for even thinking about putting me on the naughty list!)
Poor Santa.
He tries so hard to bring joy to people all over the world, and we all struggle to conduct ourselves like decent human beings for more than 24 hours at a time.
On second thought…
Look at it this way:
Being naughty saves Santa a trip.
So you’d actually be doing him a huge favor by adding more mischief into your daily routine.
Especially since you’re ultimately gonna end up buying your own presents anyway.
~Happy Friday! Hope you all have a holly jolly weekend!~
1) You really think you’ve been good enough to even receive coal!?! Ha!
2) Define “good.”
3) I told Santa you thought you’ve been good this year. He cracked a rib laughing.
4) One word for you: Krampus.
5) Santa is watching. Well yeah, I guess technically that means Krampus is watching, too…
6) Fine. Be naughty. Santa would be more than happy to save himself a trip!
7) The moment you stop believing is the moment you start receiving socks and underwear. Just remember that!
8) No, I’m not sure why Santa likes cookies so much. Yes, he is a “big dude.”
9) No, we will not create a special chimney for Santa. He can go through the front door like every other respectable human being.
10) Sorry, no. Putting you in time out will not cement my place alongside you on the naughty list.
11) One more word and we’ll pack up your toys and donate them all to kids in need. Seriously, knock it off! Or we’ll donate you, too.
12) Yeah, I know you’re having visions of sugar plums. Visions of throwing them at my head, perhaps? (C’mon. We all know nobody actually eats those things)
Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
Even Santa needs a break sometimes. Do him a favor, would ya?
comically quirky 