Exotic Pets from Hell

Searching for an untraditional pet for the kids?

Got an empty fish tank, cage, or bathtub you’d like to bring new life to?

Well, look no further!

Meet Aye-Aye, a freaky-looking Madagascar Lemur with massive eyes, enormous ears, and incredibly long fingers.

Just think of the countless hours you can spend gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes!

This is one staring contest I just can't win.

This is one staring contest I just can’t win.

Kids love Guinea Pigs, so why not take it one step further with a more unconventional route that will make all their friends jealous?

The South American native Capybara is the world’s largest rodent, weighing in at a mere 150 lbs.

He’s oh so huggable and cuddly!

With webbed feet, he’d also make a fine swimming partner on those hot summer days.

But keep in mind, they do need companionship, so a pair of Capybaras would be optimal.

Look how cute and cuddly this guy is! He's like a giant bunny rabbit...minus the long ears and adorable little tail.

Look how cute and cuddly this guy is! He’s like a giant bunny rabbit…minus the long ears and adorable little tail.

Any kid can catch an insect and stick it in a jar, but why not go for something a bit more fascinating?

Cue the Leaf Insect.

His camouflage makes him invisible, to both predators and as a predator himself.

Just a heads up, though…

When raising a fork-full of salad greens to your mouth, do everyone a favor and take a close look to ensure you are not about to devour the family pet.

I wonder if this little guy packs the same nutritional punch as a serving of spinach?

I wonder if this little guy packs the same nutritional punch as a serving of spinach?

Introducing the Giant Coconut Crab.

Yes, he will indeed eat a coconut if he manages to get his claws around one.

As the world’s largest arthropod, he eats mostly fruits and nuts.

And maybe an annoying kid brother, with any luck.

Yikes! I'm not gonna lie...this one scares me a little bit.

Yikes! I’m not gonna lie…this one scares me a little bit.

What is that smell?

The sadly misaligned skunk is truly just a pet waiting for a good home.

Skunks are loving, playful, and intelligent.

Perhaps even cuddly, depending on how adventurous you are.

Get one of these babies, and you will undoubtedly be the only person brave enough in your state (or entire region) to own one.

How can anyone not find this utterly adorable? Wait, what is that horrendous stench?

How can anyone not find this utterly adorable? Wait, what is that horrendous stench?

Interested in a pet you’ll only have to deal with once in a blue moon?

Then the Indian Purple Frog is just right for you!

Living above ground only two weeks out of the year, this frog spends the other 50 weeks under the ground, mating.

Talk about a low maintenance pet.

He’ll be around long enough to keep the kids interested and gone long enough for them to miss him.

For some strange reason, I can't picture getting too cuddly with this slimy fellow.

For some strange reason, I can’t picture getting too cuddly with this slimy fellow.

The Maui’s Dolphin is sure to be a hit with the whole family.

These dolphins love to blow bubbles and play.

The most rare and smallest subspecies of dolphin, a female will grow to only five feet.

If you have a large garden tub in the guest bathroom, or a giant empty fish tank in the family room, the wait is over!

Now this is the pet I've been waiting my whole life for! My garden tub is finally going to fulfill its true purpose!

Now this is the pet I’ve been waiting my whole life for! My garden tub is finally going to fulfill its true purpose!

While all the other families in the neighborhood have the requisite cats and dogs, you will be the envy of them all.

With just a few minor adaptations, you’ll be ready to bring home a wonderful new exotic pet!

~Happy Friday, everyone! Hope you all enjoyed a little piece of offbeat insanity! Have a great weekend!~

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16 thoughts on “Exotic Pets from Hell

  1. Does your creativity never end?? You WOW me every post. But, now I am never eating salad again. 😀 Just kidding, but thanks for the heads up on that critter. I used to host a photoblog on Facebook and collected hundreds of intriguing photos like these, but I would never have been able to create your descriptive wording! ❤ this!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Aww, thanks! My creativity is fueled mostly by insanity, I think. 😛

      I know, it will be very hard to eat salad from here on out without first raking it all around the bowl to ensure there aren’t any “pets” roaming around in there! 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Love the leaf insect and the comment about not devouring him with your salad greens. LOL! I remember loving to put “pets” in a mason jar with holes poked in the lid–mostly fireflies, but a few grasshoppers and butterflies. Mom usually talked us into releasing them back into the wild. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • I remember trying to catch fireflies as a kid, but they always managed to escape. 😀

      Oh yeah, it’d be great having to explain to the kids that Grandpa Timmy accidentally bit the head right off of their pet Twiggy the Leaf Insect during Thanksgiving dinner. 😛

      Liked by 1 person

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