H2O Woes

Not only is water important for survival…

It’s probably also going to be the very thing that ends up doing me in.

It’s true that water is simply a compound of hydrogen and oxygen.

Seems harmless enough.

But a person can drown in just an inch of water, for goodness sake.

Clearly, not one of water’s most redeeming qualities.

Water is actually pretty fascinating, though.

For instance:

  • Tap water can contain molecules that dinosaurs drank.
  • The human brain is 70%  water.
  • It takes 150 liters of water to make a pint of beer.
  • Human blood is 83% water.
  • People can live a month without food, but just a week without water.
  • Water covers 70% of the Earth’s surface.
  • Roughly 1/3 of household water consumption originates from the toilet.
  • A jellyfish is 95% water.

And did you know 3.4 million people die each year from water-related causes?

Yikes!

Granted, most of that is due to waterborne illnesses.

And dehydration.

Oh, and water intoxication.

That’s right.

Drinking too much water can cause fatal water intoxication.

Aside from the fact that I already drink far too much water, I’m also freakishly concerned about another death-by-water type of scenario:

Sometimes, I choke on water.

Like it’s just too damn hard for small amounts of water to go straight down my throat without taking a virtually lung-collapsing detour.

Hell, sometimes I somehow manage to choke on absolutely nothing.

Well, technically, it’s air that I’m choking on.

But that’s beside the point.

Water is hazardous to your health!

If you’re even remotely at risk for death by water intoxication, you’re probably better off sticking to alcohol for dinner tonight.

Might I recommend a decadent Mudslide, beer battered fries, and soft pretzels with beer cheese?

Oh, right.

That level of alcohol consumption would most definitely lead to dehydration.

Which would lead to the need for consuming water for rehydration.

Which could lead to choking to death on said water.

Although, in all fairness…

I’m probably at far greater risk for doing myself in by eating a smorgasbord of questionable-looking food that’s ever-so-slightly past the sell-by date.

From my own fridge.

So much for trying to be less wasteful.

~Happy Friday! Hope you all have a fantastic weekend!~

Don't be fooled. Water has mastered the art of being both friend and foe.

Don’t be fooled. Water has mastered the art of being both friend and foe.

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30 thoughts on “H2O Woes

  1. You are so hilarious! Thank you for this, you made me laugh. I drink a lot of water too.
    Interesting factoids too, particularly about the household water consumption originating from the toilet – who knew?
    Blessings your way… have an awesome Friday / weekend. 🙂
    Loving,
    Debbi

    Like

  2. Yes, the choking on water. Yup. And my poor son, during a swim meet, in one of his heats…his timing got off as he got tired toward the end, and yup, was taking a breath and didn’t pop up enough out of water during breast stroke…sucked in a bunch of chlorinated water. sputter/stop/sputter … NO you’re winning… I don’t care if you are choking, keep swimming, you’re right at the wall touch, touch!

    Like

    • Damn right it hurts. But then, logically, it would have to be painful, right? I mean, it’s clearly not mortifying enough to simply be choking on water.

      And then once the pain finally passes, you get to spend the next 30 minutes hacking your lungs up like some bronchitis-ridden geriatric. :/

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I manage to keep my water intake somewhere between dehydration and water intoxication… but apparently not enough to keep my kidneys flushed of those wonderful stones. Maybe if I could get a pressure washer in there….

    Liked by 2 people

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